A strong woman rarely needs emotional hand holding and when she's not needy, it creates a vacuum that makes her the person to rely on and complain to. Don't let this be discouraging. You are amazing. You are brave. You are strong. Otherwise you wouldn't be asked to shoulder someone else's emotional weight. Some people will never be happy without something to complain about. Let them complain. You don't have to hear it or believe that their tangential existence in your life gives them authority unless you allow them to. I imagine a baby duck who is too busy learning to swim to have a little water annoy them. Being spiteful with your handheld mirror only makes things worse so don't bother.