Blog by Yessica Maher, los Angeles Native.

She explores life after marriage, starting a career in her late 30's, relationships, breaking cycles of abuse, online dating, self care, fertility and depression. 

It's all over the place, but so is living. 

A Fond Farewell in Hollywood

Today was an epic farewell to a time of personal growth and transition and to the office with people that didn't even know they helped me through it.  I have a feeling what was picked up and examined today will stay in my mind in a very happy place for a long time. The picture was tonight's sunset from the office I loved for two months.  The city is covered in a blanket of fog.  I remember the 1980's, so I won't call it smog.  There is a difference.  The ocean isn't visible and it looked like layers of thickness that increased to the west where the cooler ocean air can hold the moisture in low lying clouds of ice crystals.  Farther inland where it is warmer, the crystals melt into humidity and that is your meteorology lesson.  Thank the teacher later.

Above the darkness you can see the pink and yellow clouds that were still kissing the sun's rays.  It reminded me of right now in my life.  I'm funemployed until my next assignment.  The optimist in me sees something happening next week. It's in the pink and gold above the darkness.  Realistically, I won't breathe in relief until I have landed a job because this single Mom has 3 kids to raise and they depend on me.  That's what's right in front of me. If I keep my eyes above the darkness, I can bathe in the colors and feel the warmth.  I'm keeping my head up and something amazing is right around the corner.  It always is.

For tonight there is joy and peace and butterflies still buzzing in my belly.  For tonight there's Hulu and some housework.  I was heading to the beach for a drive along the coast to clear my head, but I had crazy butterflies in my belly, the look on his face in my mind and the naughtiness in my head still warming my skin and I went on autopilot and ended up at home, driving a little too fast and hugging the curves where I found them because my happiness was overflowing.

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